Broken Culture vs. Eating Disorders


I read a quote yesterday: “You don’t inspire others by being perfect. You inspire them by how you deal with your imperfections.” I found it accompanied by a picture of Lucille Ball. Funny and light, it was able to get to my heart and soften it. I was reminded that I mustn’t pretend that I have it all together. Sometimes I can get so caught up in what I “should be” that I forget the gifts of who I am now.

I have noticed that as I age (nothing scary about the aging process!) and the new implementation of additional self-care for anxiety, my body is changing. I have been judging it and finding myself not liking it much. My thoughts are a little pesky—not powerful, like an eating disorder, but shaming nonetheless: “You should NOT feel like this, Robyn!” “You are NOT your body, Robyn!” (Duh!) “You’re a fraud, Robyn!”

The truth: I have felt judgment about my body and I am fully recovered from an eating disorder. I am a woman fully recovered, living in a broken culture, who can sometimes have a brain fart and buy into the lies. Click here to read full article

The Practice of Recovery

my loves

A couple of months ago, I visited Eating Recovery Center’s Partial Hospitalization Program for Adults where the patients always inspire me. They seemed ready and eager to leave treatment and utilize their ever-growing recovery tool kit. They were also appropriately timid regarding the transition ahead.

On this particular day, a woman asked, “How do I manage my recovery with my children, my husband and my job? It’s so easy in here; I just have to focus on myself. What happens when I leave? I’m not sure I can do it.” Boy could I relate!

Lately, I notice myself becoming overwhelmed as I have in the last year: changed communities, taken on a full-time job and have two daughters and a husband. “How will I manage it all?” I ask myself! What I know about me is that most of the time I’m beating myself up because my life doesn’t look like I think it should; I’m not measuring up to a standard I didn’t actually sign up for. Why do I keep creating impossible timelines and setting unrealistic expectations that set me up to feel overwhelmed and exhausted, ultimately causing my self-esteem to plummet? What am I trying to prove? Why do I keep comparing my insides to other people’s highlight reel? Read the full post

Finding your Inner Hero


Everyone has a guide on the inside.
And its name is not “eating disorder.”
Its name is “Truth.”

Today, I will embrace my authentic self.
Who I really am and what I have to say is
worth attention. I now give that attention
to myself by showing up for my life.

– Making Peace with Your Plate (p. 174)

When I first started recovery, I had no idea who I was. My self-worth had been crippled by my eating disorder, and my perception of who I was had been broken. Over time, within recovery, I got distance from the eating disorder and its demands and began to realize that there was a voice within me that wanted to be heard.

When I talk about the voice within me, I’m not talking about the voice that comes from a highly perfectionistic, judgmental or even self-belittling part of ourselves. I’m talking about the voice that champions us and begs us to honor ourselves, the way a power greater than ourselves meant for us to be honored. It is the energy that skirts the line between being gentle with ourselves and being accountable. It is found in our intuition, our gut, our truth…and is just waiting for us to tap into it. Dr. Roger W. Teel calls it “a divine power within us that knows more than we do.” We all have this inner voice, our very own Inner Hero that is capable of greatness. We may call it by other names, such as authentic self, wise mind, greatness, our truth, or even God.

Click here to read the full article

New Years Resoultion

new years res

Hi friends I had the honor of writing an article for  Recovery Wire Magazine: Issue 8  Last Year, I thought it would be great so share again.  I love using some of these tips with me and my kiddies at meal times. 

For over a decade, I struggled hopelessly with food and body image. My story is of eating disorder and alcoholism; but it is just one drop in the bucket. Most people have ongoing struggles with food. According to the Boston Medical Center, approximately 45 million Americans diet each year and spend $33 billion on weight-loss products. Furthermore, statistics suggest that a mere 5% of American females naturally achieves the “ideal” body portrayed by advertising — which means the rest of us are trying to reach a body ideal that fights against our genes. Continue reading New Years Resoultion

Tis the Season to be Present

Mini Chrissie tree

The truth is, whether we suffer from an eating disorder or not, the holiday season can be a little trying. There’s the fuss over what to get our family and friends for that special day, decorating, making the decision to send Christmas cards by snail mail or email — or not at all. And then there’s one of the biggest focuses of all — food, lots of food.  For those of us in recovery from an eating disorder (or trying our hardest to get there), the holiday season can sometimes feel absent of joy. I remember when I was in recovery and still struggling with eating disorder thoughts: The holiday season felt like I was walking through a minefield. At any time, one wrong move away from my eating disorder’s demands, and/or my food plan, could set off a detonator.

I want to provide you with some tools that helped me during the holiday season: Click here

Beware of Switching the Witch for the B Word that Rhymes with it.


Hi Friends, Happy Halloween.  In the spirit of Witches I wanted to share an article I wrote for Renew Magazine (Spring 2014)about the switching of addictions.

It is something that effects 35% of those who struggle with Substance Abuse and 50% of those who struggle with an eating disorder will also struggle with Substance abuse. If you or your kiddies struggle, you are not alone!
Continue reading Beware of Switching the Witch for the B Word that Rhymes with it.

Body, Beauty and Eating Disorder Recovery